Tag Archives: Self-Mastery

Self-mastery and self-discipline

Self-mastery and self-discipline are the foundation of good relationships with others.

“You can’t have the fruits without the roots.  Private victory precedes public victory.”

Stephen Covey

p. 186 The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

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Sobriety, Recovery, Money Mastery, Self-Mastery, and Time Management

Sobriety, Recovery, Money Mastery, Self-Mastery, and Time Management

 

These topics are often on my mind.  For the past few years I’ve felt it was time for me to get a grip on Time Management; yet it hasn’t been simple or easy…..rather elusive in fact!  What I’ve determined is confirmed by the esteemed Stephen Covey in my dogeared copy of his book, Daily Reflections for Highly Effective People.  He says “Time management is really a misnomer- the challenge is not to manage time, but to manage ourselves.”  THAT explains why it’s been challenging!  Managing ourselves actually requires quite a lot: maturity, discipline, Will, EQ, …….

Covey goes on to say “If you are an effective manager of your self, your discipline comes from within; it’s a function of your independent will.  You are a disciple, a follower of your own deep values and their source.  And you have the will, the integrity, to subordinate your feelings <this is the really hard part for most of us!>, your impulses, and your moods to those values.  THIS is very challenging!  It requires putting your values and your goals ahead of  how you feel and what you may want in the moment (each time there arises such a moment of conflict) for the sake of what you value and what you want in the long run.  This requires Emotional Intelligence (EQ) and maturity!

Several years ago during the end of my architecture career, I had a conversation with a much older architect.  We were talking about diet and health.  He practices Dean Ornish’s eating plan and program to reverse heart disease AND he’s French.  I asked if this was a conflict for him, if he struggled with making healthy food choices rather than eating beautiful french food.  His reply has remained with me and continues to influence me.  He said : ” If I want to go to San Francisco, I don’t get on the BART train that’s going the other direction.  I don’t spend any time thinking about that other train because it won’t take me where I want to go.”  It’s that simple.  It’s just not that easy for most of us. I remember this when I struggle with my own stuff.  I have achieved something that I’ve wanted to achieve for the past 20 years: I gave up black tea, coffee and caffeinated drinks.  It’s soon going to be a year since this became effective.   I really appreciate the difference that no caffeine has made in my life!   At times, I think about that other train, but I’m able to put the value I hold in my chosen destination above the momentary experience of any of these drinks.  I guess this what people in recovery do. A certain emotional sobriety is involved.  I’m truly amazed that I’ve been able to do this every time for a year now.   This gives me great faith that I can do the same with a few other struggles.  Baby steps lead to a sudden leap.

THE SECRET TO INCREASING YOUR INCOME MORE EASILY, Part 4

THE SECRET TO INCREASING YOUR INCOME MORE EASILY, Part 4

Face your fears
They are there to make your stronger, more agile and a better player. They show up as information to guide you to a place that in an untapped well of energy. Once you master this, nothing can stop you. Nothing. No challenge that shows up will daunt you. It is one of the keys to successful leadership and self-mastery.
Your relationship with money is as real as any relationship. So think about it. When you are being yourself, loving yourself, proud of yourself, you attract a real sustainable, sensational relationship. If you are out there ‘fishing’, being what you think will attract another, being desperate and doing whatever it takes, what usually happens to the relationship when the real you comes to the surface? Or what do you have to do to keep the relationship you attracted when you were out of integrity with yourself? And how exhausting and distracting is that?

It is the same thing in business and goes back to the point about knowing who you really are. And THIS is what you market. Look at all the great companies you know or love-there is an identifiable person who most people really respect that draws the client or the customer.

This is the truest power there is. Once you have rediscovered the place you came from, your vulnerability, nothing can ever take your power again. Look at a child-could hey be more vulnerable? And are not most children fearless? When you can be comfortable in being vulnerable you will have discovered your greatest source of strength. It is counterintuitive but it is real. You must have this tool in your tool belt for you to build your dreams.

Food for Thought

Here are some quotes that inspire and remind me to be on purpose:

Between stimulus and response is our greatest power- the freedom to choose.

Stephen Covey

Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re usually right.

Henry Ford

Because we are, by nature, proactive, if our lives are a function of conditioning and conditions, it is because we have, by conscious decision or by default, chosen to empower those things to control us.

Stephen Covey

Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like.

Will Rogers

To freely bloom- that is my definition of success.

Gerry Spence

You can’t have the fruits without the roots.

It’s the principle of sequencing: Private Victory precedes Public Victory.

Self-Mastery and self-discipline are the foundation of good relationships with others.

Stephen Covey

Full effort is full victory

Stephen Covey

The more aware we are of our basic paradigms, maps, or assumptions, and the extent to which we have been influenced by our experience, the more we can take responsibility for those paradigms, examine them, test them against reality, listen to others and be open to their perceptions, thereby getting a larger picture and a far more objective view.

Stephen Covey

Between stimulus and response is our greatest power- the freedom to choose.

Stephen Covey

Because we are, by nature, proactive, if our lives are a function of conditioning and conditions, it is because we have, by conscious decision or by default, chosen to empower those things to control us.

Stephen Covey

We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust our sails.

Your attitude plays a critical role in success, fulfillment of your goals or dreams, etc… You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you as well as your response; in this way, you master change, growth and yourself.

Me